So yesterday I had a full day. School run, coffee, counselling, Henry pick up, lunch with friends, William pick up, home, out again for William play therapy, late dinner, boys bed, boots off and feet up! Even though it was a lovely day and I felt really good all day as usual when I feel good I do too much I fill my day with lovely but busy things. So today I am feeling the results. A group of butterflies have taken up residence in my chest. I feel fluttery, shaky, on edge, it feels like tears are sitting in my eyes for no reason. The ups and downs of this illness. I don’t think I will ever learn to stop when the going is good but at least I know the results won’t last forever. I expected to feel like this yesterday after returning from London but I didn’t so it has hit me harder today! So how do I deal with it? Mostly I sit still, read, watch telly, draw, write, play quietly with the boys. Everything else can wait. Try not to listen to the “I should be’s” or “I could be’s” it can all wait until later. No plans, no need, just be!
Showered, hair washed but not done, dressed but not tidy, breakfast but not cleared away, no makeup and cuddles! Just need Saturday kitchen now and all will be fine soon!
From Lala, with love xx